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List of Newhart episodes

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The following is an episode list for the American television sitcom Newhart, that ran on CBS for eight seasons and 184 episodes, from October 25, 1982, to May 21, 1990. The show starred Bob Newhart, Mary Frann, Tom Poston, Julia Duffy, Peter Scolari, Steven Kampmann, and Jennifer Holmes, as well as other recurring characters.

Series overview

[edit]
SeasonEpisodesOriginally aired
First airedLast aired
122October 25, 1982April 10, 1983
222October 17, 1983April 16, 1984
322October 15, 1984May 28, 1985
424September 30, 1985May 12, 1986
524September 29, 1986April 13, 1987
624September 14, 1987May 9, 1988
722October 24, 1988May 22, 1989
824September 18, 1989May 21, 1990

Episodes

[edit]

Season 1 (1982–83)

[edit]
  • This is the only season to be shot on videotape.
No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air dateProd.
code
Rating/share
(households)
11"In the Beginning"John RichBarry KempOctober 25, 1982 (1982-10-25)121023.7/34[1]
Writer Dick Loudon and his wife Joanna move to Vermont and purchase the Stratford Inn, and encounter eccentric townsfolk such as George Utley, a competent but somewhat dimwitted handyman, and Kirk Devane, a habitual liar who runs the Minuteman Cafe next door. In addition, the Loudons hire Leslie Vanderkellen, the daughter of a wealthy family, to serve as their maid. After opening for business, Dick must break the news to the Daughters of the War for Independence that the Inn served as a brothel during the Revolutionary War period.
22"Mrs. Newton's Body Lies A-Mould'ring in the Grave"Will MackenzieKatherine GreenNovember 1, 1982 (1982-11-01)210622.2/33[2]
When the Loudons find out that there is a body buried down in the basement of the Inn, they try to get the body moved to the church graveyard. But they later find out the body used to be the body of a witch. First appearance of Larry, Darryl & Darryl.
33"Hail to the Councilman"Will MackenzieSheldon BullNovember 8, 1982 (1982-11-08)210119.5/29[3]
When Dick is asked to run for town council, he gets help from Joanna and Leslie with his campaign. First appearance of Jim and Chester.
44"Shall We Gather at the River?"Will MackenziePaul Robinson HunterNovember 15, 1982 (1982-11-15)210724.2/36[4]
Dick talks a reluctant Joanna into going to the annual River Day Festival, where she falls through the ice.
55"This Probably Is Condemned"Will MackenzieBarton DeanNovember 22, 1982 (1982-11-22)210320.6/30[5]
Dick and the gang pitch in to help Kirk get the Minuteman up to code after its shut down. Dick Christie appears as a maple syrup salesman, and Jim Boeke as the health inspector.
66"No Tigers at the Circus"Will MackenzieEarl PomerantzNovember 29, 1982 (1982-11-29)210920.7/29[6]
Dick becomes bent out of shape when Stratford Inn is denied its bid to be classified as a historical landmark.
77"The Perfect Match"Dick MartinStuart SilvermanDecember 6, 1982 (1982-12-06)210519.1/27[7]
Leslie's high school sweetheart (Howard McGillin) returns to ask her to marry him. This makes Kirk jealous.
88"Some Are Born Writers...Others Have Writers Thrust Upon Them"Will MackenzieEmily MarshallDecember 13, 1982 (1982-12-13)210821.3/31[8]
Dick praises an author's work in order to spare her feelings. The author's enthusiastic husband (Earl Boen) quits his job so that his wife can be a writer full time. It is up to Dick to find her an agent and teach her how to write. The writer is played by Judith Kahan, who is Steven Kampmann's real-life wife.
99"No Room at the Inn"Dick MartinBarry Kemp, Sheldon Bull and Emily MarshallDecember 20, 1982 (1982-12-20)211222.5/34[9][10]
The Inn is overcrowded when 24 guests are snowed in for Christmas Eve. Kirk helps to keep the guests entertained while Dick attempts to find a place for a man named Joseph and his pregnant wife to stay for the night.
1010"The Senator's Wife Was Indiscreet"Dick MartinJohn Steven OwenDecember 27, 1982 (1982-12-27)210218.5/28[11][12]
A United States Senator's wife (Penny Fuller) checks into the Stratford Inn and holds a press conference saying that she will divorce her husband (Robert Hogan).
1111"Sprained Dreams"Will MackenzieRich ReinhartJanuary 3, 1983 (1983-01-03)211020.6/29[13]
While Leslie is trying to teach Dick how to ski, he accidentally falls on her, jeopardizing her dream of becoming a professional skier and making her unable to go on a date with Kirk. Alley Mills as Leslie's professor; Stephen Furst as a classmate.
1212"The Way We Thought We Were"Will MackenzieJohn Steven OwenJanuary 10, 1983 (1983-01-10)211121.3/31[14]
George's old girlfriend (Rue McClanahan) visits the Inn and both of them are surprised to see they have both changed greatly.
1313"The Visitors"Michael ZinbergEarl PomerantzJanuary 17, 1983 (1983-01-17)211317.3/24[15][16]
Dick and Joanna are excited that their "fun" friends are visiting them, but they are not as happy when they treat them more like innkeepers instead of friends. Guest starring Dana Elcar and K Callan.
1414"What Is This Thing Called Lust?"Will MackenzieEmily MarshallJanuary 31, 1983 (1983-01-31)212020.7/29[17]
Leslie's attractive cousin Stephanie visits Vermont and develops feelings for Kirk. Meanwhile, Joanna is excited when George gets a free piano for the Inn's lobby. First appearance of Stephanie Vanderkellen (Julia Duffy).
1515"Breakfast Theater"Will MackenzieChip Keyes & Doug KeyesFebruary 7, 1983 (1983-02-07)211714.6/19[18]
A washed-up comic, Manny Silver (Bobby Ramsen), visits the Inn, reminding Dick of the "debt" he owes him for starting his writing career. Manny gets Dick to let him perform at the Stratford.
1616"Ricky Nelson, Up Your Nose"Will MackenzieBarton DeanFebruary 14, 1983 (1983-02-14)211517.5/25[19]
Kirk goes to the hospital to get surgery to remove an object from his nose and Larry, Darryl, and Darryl are in charge of his cafe.
1717"A View from the Bench"Will MackenzieSheldon BullFebruary 21, 1983 (1983-02-21)212119.9/28[20]
Dick, Kirk, and George use their bench passes for a Boston Celtics game, but Dick loses his pass. Joanna and Leslie wait at the Inn for a famous guest. Special appearance by Daniel J. Travanti as himself. Ernie Sabella as a policeman.
1818"The Boy Who Cried Goat"Will MackenzieBarbara HallMarch 13, 1983 (1983-03-13)211422.6/34[21]
Kirk's cafe gets robbed, but the police don't believe his story of how it happened when he tells them.
1919"Heaven Knows Mr. Utley"Will MackenzieBill Taub & Jeff LewisMarch 20, 1983 (1983-03-20)211922.0/34[22]
When George believes he saw a UFO, nobody believes him and he is mocked by the whole town. James Avery appears in this episode.
2020"You're Homebody Till Somebody Loves You"Will MackenzieEmily MarshallMarch 27, 1983 (1983-03-27)212413.6/19[23][24]
Dick insults Joanna and calls her a homebody, making her want to get a job. Jerry Van Dyke appears as a travel agent who hires her.
2121"Grandma, What a Big Mouth You Have"Will MackenzieBarton DeanApril 3, 1983 (1983-04-03)212517.9/28[25]
Kirk's grandmother (Ruth Gordon) visits on the same day he has a date with Leslie.
2222"I Enjoy Being a Guy"Will MackenzieBob Perlow & Gene BraunsteinApril 10, 1983 (1983-04-10)212321.4/32[26]
Dick's friends Chester and Jim invite him to play golf with them. But his friends gamble and lose making him the winner. He tries to give the money back without breaking the "guy code." Kirk takes George shopping for clothes. Last appearance of Jennifer Holmes as Leslie Vanderkellen.

Season 2 (1983–84)

[edit]
  • Seasons 2–8 were shot on film.
No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air dateProd.
code
Rating/share
(households)
231"It Happened One Afternoon: Part 1"Rod DanielBarry KempOctober 17, 1983 (1983-10-17)310117.1/25[27]
Dick goes to New York to interview a star named Erica Chase (Stella Stevens) for a possible biography. Joanna hires Stephanie to be the new maid. John Reilly appears as Erica's manager, and Lee Wilkof as Dick's agent, Elliot.
242"It Happened One Afternoon: Part 2"Rod DanielBarry KempOctober 24, 1983 (1983-10-24)310220.1/29[28]
Erica Chase falls in love with Dick while Stephanie's father flies to Vermont to try to get her to go back home with him. Richard Roat as Arthur Vanderkellen. (Later played by Jose Ferrer.)
253"Animal Attractions"Rod DanielEmily MarshallOctober 31, 1983 (1983-10-31)310319.6/29[29]
George finds a stray dog whom he names "Lucky" and Stephanie's (much older) husband, Carl (Murray Matheson), drops by the Inn to find out why she left him.
264"The Stratford Wives"Donna WheelerBarbara HallNovember 7, 1983 (1983-11-07)310619.2/28[30]
Joanna creates a stir at a potluck dinner by breaking a long-standing tradition whereby men eat in the dining room, women in the kitchen.
275"The Girl from Manhattan"Linda DayStory by : Michael Vetrie
Teleplay by : Nat Mauldin
November 14, 1983 (1983-11-14)310819.2/28[31]
Joanna convinces Dick to do a play he had written years before. Joanna gets mad when she is cast as her mother instead of herself in the play.
286"Don't Rain on My Parade"Will MackenzieBarbara HallNovember 21, 1983 (1983-11-21)311518.6/27[32]
Dick volunteers Joanna to serve turkeys to over 100 people. George is upset when rain ruins his Thanksgiving Day Parade. George D. Wallace and Peggy McCay play Joanna's parents. Iron Eyes Cody has a cameo.
297"Lady & the Tramps"Donna WheelerEmily MarshallDecember 5, 1983 (1983-12-05)311218.2/26[33]
Stephanie goes out for a walk and gets lost in a snowstorm. She finds Larry, Darryl, and Darryl's home. William Sadler (Actor) as Clumsy Guest.
308"The Man Who Came Forever"Rod DanielSheldon BullDecember 12, 1983 (1983-12-12)310518.2/27[34]
Dick has a deadline for when he has to finish writing his book but can't get it done due to interruptions. Kirk decides he wants to build a miniature golf course, George is worried about retirement, and a guest at the Inn (Ernie Sabella) refuses to leave.
319"The Looks of Love"Dick MartinShelley ZellmanDecember 19, 1983 (1983-12-19)310417.3/25[35]
Kirk joins a singles club hoping to find a girlfriend. Shanna Reed as the woman he fails to impress. Ernie Sabella as the guest carried over from the previous episode.
3210"Kirk Goes for the Juggler"Will MackenzieEmily MarshallJanuary 2, 1984 (1984-01-02)310923.5/33[36]
Kirk believes he has found the girl of his dreams, but he reconsiders when he hears she is a professional clown. Rebecca York's first appearance as Cindy Parker.
3311"A Jug of Wine, a Loaf of Bread and POW"Dick MartinBarry Kemp, Sheldon Bull and Emily MarshallJanuary 9, 1984 (1984-01-09)312014.7/21[37]
Joanna and Stephanie attend a poetry reading at Dartmouth where the Professor (John Reilly) has a special interest in Joanna. Dick gets steamed when he hears he made a pass at his wife. Kirk and Cindy convince George to go in with them on basketball tickets.
3412"Cats"Jim DrakeBarry Kemp, Sheldon Bull and Emily MarshallJanuary 16, 1984 (1984-01-16)312117.3/25[38]
Stephanie's old boyfriend (David Huffman) and his wife visit the Inn. Kirk throws a dinner party for Cindy, Dick, Joanna, and himself.
3513"Curious George at the Firehouse"Will MackenzieBarbara HallJanuary 23, 1984 (1984-01-23)311119.7/28[39]
George becomes a volunteer fireman but loses the keys to the fire truck right when the town's first fire in five years takes place.
3614"Book Beat"Will MackenzieStory by : Will Porter & Rich Procter
Teleplay by : Miriam Trogdon
January 30, 1984 (1984-01-30)311419.4/27[40]
After Dick guest stars on a TV show, they ask him to be the new host of the show. His first show gets off to a bad start, though, when his guest star does not show up, and the replacement (Guy Boyd) turns out to be delusional. (This marks Peter Scolari's debut as Michael Harris; he would go on to become a regular cast member beginning with Season 3.)
3715"Kirk Pops the Question"Jim DrakeMiriam TrogdonFebruary 6, 1984 (1984-02-06)311914.9/21[41]
Kirk asks Dick and George for advice about whether or not he should propose to Cindy. Dick makes a personal appearance at a local hardware store to sign copies of his book. Frank Bonner appears as a guest who has phobias about hotels and stairs. Richard Stahl as a waiter.
3816"Best Friends"Will MackenzieBarry Kemp and Emily MarshallFebruary 13, 1984 (1984-02-13)312313.8/20[42]
Kirk fears his cafe will be out of business when a fast-food company wants to build a restaurant in town. But when they announce they want to build on the site of the café he realizes he will be rich if he sells, and must make a difficult decision.
3917"Kirk Ties One On"Will MackenieBarry Kemp, Sheldon Bull and Emily MarshallFebruary 27, 1984 (1984-02-27)312213.9/19[43]
Kirk can't wait till his wedding day with Cindy, but when the day finally comes, he faints during the ceremony. Bill Quinn as the minister.
4018"Go, Grandma, Go"John TracyBarbara HallMarch 5, 1984 (1984-03-05)312617.7/27[44]
Kirk's grandmother (Ruth Gordon) visits and loans her car to Kirk and Cindy for their honeymoon. But when Kirk gets arrested for possession of a stolen car, he realizes something is wrong. Squire Fridell appears as a policeman.
4119"Leave It to the Beavers"Will MackenzieEmily Marshall, Barbara Hall and Miriam TrogdonMarch 12, 1984 (1984-03-12)312714.4/22[45]
George's club, the Beavers, reject Dick for a membership. A guest at the Inn (Richard Sanders) is accompanied by an imaginary wife. Kirk and Cindy have their first fight.
4220"Vermont Today"John TracyBarry Kemp, Sheldon Bull and Emily MarshallMarch 19, 1984 (1984-03-19)312922.4/34[46]
Dick gets his own television program called Vermont Today. Stephanie meets the man of her dreams, Michael Harris. Anne Haney plays a cooking show host. Britt Leach makes a guest appearance, as does Lucy Lee Flippin as the basset hound lady.
4321"Send Her, Ella"John TracyBarbara Hall & Miriam TrogdonMarch 26, 1984 (1984-03-26)312821.0/32[47]
Stephanie is disappointed when she has to watch the Inn rather than compete in the Maple Syrup beauty contest. So she makes a disguise and sneaks off to the competition, leaving the Inn in the hands of a seemingly-trustworthy guest (Billie Bird).
4422"New Faces of 1951"John TracyStory by : Neal Marlens
Teleplay by : Ken Peragine & Howard Friedlander
April 16, 1984 (1984-04-16)310716.6/26[48]
Dick and Joanna plan a birthday party for George when he reveals he has never had one. Dick calls and invites everyone George knows, but they are all busy. He instead calls what he thinks are George's Air National Guard buddies. Last appearance of Steven Kampmann as Kirk Devane.

Season 3 (1984–85)

[edit]
No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air dateProd.
code
Rating/share
(households)
451"Tell a Lie, Get a Check"John TracyDan WilcoxOctober 15, 1984 (1984-10-15)410521.0/31[49]
Dick and Joanna return from their vacation to find Kirk and Cindy have moved to Europe and that Kirk has asked Dick to sell his cafe. Michael wants Dick to tape a tacky ad to promote his TV show. Ray Walston appears in this episode.
462"Twenty Year Itch"Dick MartinMiriam TrogdonOctober 22, 1984 (1984-10-22)410918.8/28[50]
Dick tags along when Joanna decides to keep a date made twenty years earlier with an old boyfriend. A guest at the Inn (Doug Rowe) annoys everyone by incessantly practicing on his trumpet. Derek McGrath plays a waiter.
473"A Hunting We Will Go"Jim DrakeBarton DeanOctober 29, 1984 (1984-10-29)410416.2/24[51]
Dick, George, Chester, Jim, and Michael go duck hunting on the opening day of hunting season to film a television special. They're all stranded when Michael forgets to tie off the boat. With death seemingly imminent, they all discuss their regrets in life, including Dick's admission that he always wanted to play Professor Harold Hill in The Music Man.
484"Miss Stephanie"Dick MartinDouglas WymanNovember 5, 1984 (1984-11-05)411118.4/28[52]
Larry is overly encouraged by a compliment from Stephanie and announces that he intends to marry her.
495"But Seriously, Beavers"Ellen FalconArnie Kogen & Gary JacobsNovember 12, 1984 (1984-11-12)411219.1/28[53]
Dick's jokes at a Beaver Lodge roast for George are a hit with everyone except the guest of honor, spurring George to consider leaving the Inn. Stephanie sells cosmetic kits.
506"Tickets, Please"John TracyBarton DeanNovember 19, 1984 (1984-11-19)411414.0/20[54]
Dick throws a fit and is sentenced for outstanding parking tickets on the day of a big Celtics game. Stephanie, who's never been punished for anything in her life, can't bring herself to tell Dick that she's the one who got the tickets. Jeff Corey portrays the judge.
517"Poor Reception"Dick MartinE.J. PurdumNovember 26, 1984 (1984-11-26)411018.0/26[55]
After Michael is roped into hiring Stephanie as WPIV's receptionist, he can't bring himself to fire her. Meanwhile, Joanna hires Harley Estin as a temporary maid.
528"The Fan"John TracyShelley ZellmanDecember 3, 1984 (1984-12-03)410820.5/30[56]
A fan of Dick's (Deena Freeman) annoys him, starts a Dick Loudon Fan Club, and moves into the Inn. Gloria Henry has a cameo as a guest of the Inn.
539"Happy Trials to You"Jim DrakeDouglas WymanDecember 10, 1984 (1984-12-10)410223.3/35[57]
Dick has to go to court when a farmer (Raye Birk) claims he plagiarized his work.
Note: The final episode of The Bob Newhart Show was called "Happy Trails to You",so this title might be a riff on that episode title.
5410"Georgie's Girl"Jim DrakeMiriam TrogdonDecember 31, 1984 (1984-12-31)410315.6/29[58]
George panics when his new girlfriend (Susan Ruttan) starts to talk about marriage. Stephanie tries to pass the driver's test.
5511"Pillow Fight"Peter BaldwinShelley ZellmanJanuary 7, 1985 (1985-01-07)411720.8/30[59]
Dick and Joanna squabble over "creative differences" when they collaborate on a book on pillows. Larry, Darryl, and Darryl stay at the Inn until their house is done being fumigated. Lee Wilkof as Dick's agent, Elliot
5612"Local Hero"John PasquinEllen GuylasJanuary 14, 1985 (1985-01-14)411619.3/28[60]
George becomes a local hero after he saves two boys from drowning.
5713"Dick Gets Larry's Goat"Burt BrinckerhoffBarton DeanFebruary 4, 1985 (1985-02-04)411915.1/21[61]
When the Loudons call animal control on Larry's goat, they get in a battle with Larry and the Darryls.
5814"Once I Had a Secret Love"John PasquinEllen GuylasFebruary 11, 1985 (1985-02-11)410619.9/29[62]
Dick and Joanna spar after Dick is 'riddled' with doubts when Joanna is set to appear on his Valentine's Day Show. Jack Bannon as "The Love Doctor"
5915"Lady in Wading"John TracyDavid MirkinFebruary 18, 1985 (1985-02-18)411517.9/26[63]
Stephanie meets a television executive (Charles Frank) whom she falls for, but she must choose between him or Michael.
6016"Look Homeward, Stephanie"Ellen FalconMiriam TrogdonFebruary 25, 1985 (1985-02-25)412118.7/27[64]
Stephanie returns home and visits briefly but soon decides to stay after she is overwhelmed with presents. José Ferrer and Priscilla Morrill's debuts as Arthur and Marian Vanderkellen.
6117"My Fair Larry"Burt BrinckerhoffMichael KaganMarch 4, 1985 (1985-03-04)411320.7/30[65]
Joanna undertakes a massive project when she agrees to try to spruce up Larry, Darryl, and Darryl—along with their Minuteman cafe. Walter Olkewicz plays a guest at the Inn who suffers from insomnia.
6218"You're Nobody Till Somebody Hires You"Richard SakaiDavid MirkinMarch 11, 1985 (1985-03-11)412219.7/30[66]
After demanding extravagant perks, Michael is fired from WPIV. Bev replaces him with Dick. An unemployed Michael falls to pieces, and Dick is exasperated with his new job duties. Richard Stahl as a member of the TV crew.
6319"Out with the New, Inn with the Good"Dick MartinTracy Gamble & Richard VaczyMarch 18, 1985 (1985-03-18)411821.3/32[67]
George is upset when Dick and Harley Estin decide to remodel the garage. Joanna hosts a rummage sale.
6420"R.I.P. Off"Peter BaldwinRuss WoodyApril 8, 1985 (1985-04-08)412019.2/30[68]
Harley (Jeff Doucette ) goes to jail after he is tricked into selling swamp grave plots. Michael, Dick and Joanna set up an "Abscam" to catch the real criminal, Harley's boss (George Wyner). G. W. Bailey has a cameo as a member of the Beaver Lodge.
6521"The Prodigal Darryl"Dick MartinDouglas WymanMay 6, 1985 (1985-05-06)412318.1/27[69]
Larry's brother Darryl runs off after he and his brothers win a contest for writing the best commercial jingle, netting them $30,000. Dick, Larry and his other brother Darryl search for the missing brother. Meanwhile, Joanna decorates the Inn in Christmas decor for a Christmas card photo.
6622"What Makes Dick Run"Dick MartinArnie Kogen & Gary JacobsMay 27, 1985 (1985-05-27)412412.5/19[70]
Dick and his crew have VITA fever when the local broadcasting awards, the VITAs, are scheduled to be announced. Dick, inspired by a puppet show put on by Larry and the boys for an ailing Stephanie, decides to jazz up his act to win a VITA nomination. Richard Stahl as part of the TV crew. Estelle Getty as a guest on Vermont Today.

Season 4 (1985–86)

[edit]
No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air dateProd.
code
Rating/share
(households)
671"Pirate Pete"Peter BaldwinGary BelkinSeptember 30, 1985 (1985-09-30)511221.2/30[71]
Dick fills in for kiddie TV program host Pirate Pete (David Wayne), but is appalled by Pete's commercialism and inadvertently gets the show canceled. George plays a practical joke on Stephanie, adjusting her scale up two pounds.
682"The Way We Ought to Be"Ellen FalconMiriam TrogdonOctober 7, 1985 (1985-10-07)510418.5/27[72]
Michael and Stephanie break up when Michael decides he's tired of her demanding ways. Dick has troubles with the WPIV staff when they're slow to direct his show.
693"Summa Cum Larry"Peter BaldwinArnie Kogen & Gary JacobsOctober 21, 1985 (1985-10-21)510220.2/29[73]
Dick covers for Larry when he goes to night school and doesn't want the Darryls to know he's improving himself. Joanna obsesses when a travel guide appears to have lowered the Inn's rating. Sandy Helberg as Larry's teacher. Richard Seff as the travel guide's author.
704"Oh, That Morocco"Peter BaldwinBarton DeanOctober 28, 1985 (1985-10-28)511319.4/29[74]
Dick suggests to Joanna that she find a local organization to join in order to make new friends. After a disastrous first meeting with the Elm Street Society, Joanna becomes best friends with Stephanie, who insists they go on a vacation to Morocco. George builds a bookcase for the lobby by following the directions in one of Dick's books.
715"Candidate Larry"Dick MartinDouglas WymanNovember 4, 1985 (1985-11-04)510117.6/25[75]
Larry runs for mayor. Michael takes care of a friend's dog. Earl Boen as the mayor. The show is dedicated to Nelson Riddle, composer of incidental music for most of the shows, and who had died on October 6, 1985.
726"Locks, Stocks, and Noodlehead"Peter BaldwinBarton DeanNovember 11, 1985 (1985-11-11)510520.0/27[76]
Stephanie's father visits the Inn with news that he has left his wife. The town celebrates Colonial Days, but Dick refuses to wear a colonial costume.
737"The Geezers in the Band"Dick MartinDavid MirkinNovember 25, 1985 (1985-11-25)510321.7/31[77]
When Dick's old high school jazz band reunites, Dick learns that expectations often exceed reality. Sorrell Booke as a band member.
748"The Shape of Things"Peter BaldwinJohn Steven OwenDecember 2, 1985 (1985-12-02)511019.5/27[78]
Stephanie and Joanna organize an aerobics club. Problems arise when Stephanie makes herself the manager and Joanna the custodian.
759"Write to Privacy"Dick MartinSusan BeaversDecember 16, 1985 (1985-12-16)510817.3/26[79]
Joanna and Stephanie are furious at Michael when they peek at his diary and find out what he really thinks of them.
7610"Still the Beavers"Peter BaldwinKatherine GreenDecember 23, 1985 (1985-12-23)511118.1/28[80]
Dick convinces George to quit the Beaver Lodge when the Beavers cheat George out of a prize rightfully his. George starts a rival Lodge to get back at them.
7711"Much Ado About Mitch"Dick MartinJanet LeahyJanuary 6, 1986 (1986-01-06)510720.0/29[81]
George joins a Big Brother program and is dismayed when his young protege Mitch (Scott Curtis) is awestruck by Dick's fast-paced lifestyle. Michael and Stephanie use a Ouija board.
7812"Look Ma, No Talent"Ellen FalconStory by : Dan Wilcox & Jesse Levine
Teleplay by : Dan Wilcox
January 13, 1986 (1986-01-13)510621.6/31[82]
Michael tries to find a talent to impress his mother (Ruth Manning).
7913"Larry's Dead, Long Live Larry"John PasquinLissa LevinJanuary 20, 1986 (1986-01-20)510921.0/31[83]
Larry dedicates his life to Dick when he believes he brought him back from the dead.
8014"Stephanie Nightingale"Ellen FalconShelley ZellmanJanuary 27, 1986 (1986-01-27)511718.5/27[84]
Stephanie must take care of the Inn's staff and guests when the measles come to Vermont. Peter Hobbs plays a doctor.
8115"The Stratford Horror Picture Show"John PasquinDavid MirkinFebruary 3, 1986 (1986-02-03)511521.7/31[85]
The Loudons are spooked when the ghost of Sarah Newton seems to be haunting the Inn. Bruce French and Marilyn Schreffler as the previous owners of the Inn.
8216"I Do, Okay"Ellen FalconDouglas WymanFebruary 10, 1986 (1986-02-10)511420.8/29[86]
Joanna and a decidedly unenthusiastic Dick decide to renew their wedding vows to celebrate their wedding anniversary.
8317"The Snowmen Cometh"John PasquinArnie Kogen & Gary JacobsFebruary 17, 1986 (1986-02-17)511618.5/27[87]
The town panics when the annual Snow Carnival will probably be canceled due to lack of snow.
8418"Will the Real Dick Loudon Please Shut Up?"Dick MartinPhoef SuttonFebruary 24, 1986 (1986-02-24)511820.3/29[88]
Dick is thrilled when a production company expresses interest in making How to be a Plumber into a video. His elation quickly dissipates when the producers decide to recast 'Dick Loudon' because of Dick's shifty eyes and stammer. Alan Autry plays "Dick Loudon" in the video. Carolyn Mignini as a guest who takes a liking to Larry, Darryl and Darryl.
8519"He Ain't Human, He's My Cousin"John PasquinBarton DeanMarch 3, 1986 (1986-03-03)511919.6/29[89]
George meets his only living relative, his annoying cousin Eugene (Derek McGrath).
8620"Dwight Schmidlapp Is Not a Quitter"Dick MartinJanet LeahyMarch 10, 1986 (1986-03-10)512017.7/26[90]
On a lark, Dick submits his newest book to his publisher under the pseudonym he used when he first started writing, Dwight Schmidlapp, only to find it rejected. Dick sinks into a funk when he realizes he's 'coasting' in his writing career. Keith Charles as a publisher.
8721"Torn Between Three Brothers"Dolores FerraroDavid MirkinMarch 17, 1986 (1986-03-17)512219.5/30[91]
A jilted fiancée at the Inn (Teresa Ganzel) gets a job at the Minuteman café. She unwittingly encourages the affections of both Darryls but rejects them for the more vocal Larry. George organizes a citywide campaign when Michael pulls Barnaby Jones off the air in favor of The Secret Lives of Platinum Gold Dancers.
8822"Baby, I'm Your Handyman"Peter BaldwinPhoef SuttonApril 7, 1986 (1986-04-07)512319.5/30[92]
Dick and Joanna worry that George is being taken advantage of after he becomes romantically involved with Loretta Dupris (Marlyn Mason), an actress with a reputation for using men. WPIV director J.J. Wall (Fred Applegate) becomes Dick's neighbor after he buys a historic house near the Stratford Inn that he plans to raze.
8923"Replaceable You"J.D. LobueMiriam TrogdonApril 14, 1986 (1986-04-14)512420.1/30[93]
Secretary Alma (Helen Page Camp) amazes Dick when she fills in as producer, who secures a rare interesting guest (Gerald Hiken). George asks Joanna for help with redecorating his room.
9024"Pre-Nups"Peter BaldwinArnie Kogen & Gary JacobsMay 12, 1986 (1986-05-12)512114.7/22[94]
The Loudons, George, Steph, and Michael are invited to Vanderkellen mansion for Arthur's birthday. Arthur insists Michael sign a pre-nuptial agreement, which he refuses to do. Stephanie fears Michael's only dating her for her money. Dick worries when he breaks a music box given to Arthur by Winston Churchill.

Season 5 (1986–87)

[edit]
No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air dateProd.
code
Rating/share
(households)
911"Co-Hostess Twinkie"Dolores FerraroDavid MirkinSeptember 29, 1986 (1986-09-29)610821.9/32[95]
Dick is stuck with a perky, brainless co-hostess (Julie Brown) for his new program, On the Town. Meanwhile, Larry and the Darryls name their new pig 'Miss Stephanie' much to the real Stephanie's dismay.
922"Camp Stephanie"Tom TrbovichRobin Pennington & Don HartOctober 6, 1986 (1986-10-06)610118.8/28[96]
Stephanie has her hands full when she temporarily leads a group of 'Ranger Girls'. While Steph tries to teach them about coming-out parties and makeup, the girls want to learn survival techniques. Meanwhile, Dick and Joanna endure George's wood carving, Mount Stratford. Bob Newhart's daughter Courtney plays one of the Ranger Girls.
933"Dick the Kid"Barton DeanArnie KogenOctober 13, 1986 (1986-10-13)610921.5/31[97]
Dick heads west to pursue his dream of being a cowboy. Stephanie secretly hires Larry, Darryl & Darryl to perform her housekeeping duties at the Inn. Kurtwood Smith and Blake Clark appear as cowboys.
944"High Fidelity"Michael LessacTom Seeley & Norm GunzenhauserOctober 20, 1986 (1986-10-20)610520.4/30[98]
Dick endures the townspeople's pity when Joanna and new friend Hal (Robert S. Woods) are suspected by everyone of having an affair. Stephanie is depressed after her hair dresser moves away.
955"Desperately Desiring Susan: Part 1"David SteinbergMiriam TrogdonOctober 27, 1986 (1986-10-27)610320.0/28[99]
Michael meets an office secretary named Susan (Jean Bruce Scott) and falls in love with her.
966"Desperately Desiring Susan: Part 2"David SteinbergMiriam TrogdonNovember 3, 1986 (1986-11-03)610420.2/39[100]
Michael has trouble deciding between Susan or Stephanie.
977"My Two and Only"Michael LessacDouglas WymanNovember 17, 1986 (1986-11-17)610717.0/24[101]
A new friend (Sam Whipple) threatens Larry's position as family leader. Stephanie and Michael throw a party for themselves.
988"Thanksgiving for the Memories"J.D. LobueDavid MirkinNovember 24, 1986 (1986-11-24)611420.1/29[102]
The Loudon family and friends travel to Vanderkellen mansion for Thanksgiving but are forced to leave early because Stephanie's parents threw away her favorite toy. Everyone ends up having Thanksgiving dinner at the Minuteman Café instead.
999"Utley, Can You Spend a Dime?"Tom TrbovichDavid Tyron KingDecember 1, 1986 (1986-12-01)610221.2/31[103]
Dick convinces George to spend some of his $50,000 dollar fortune. Meanwhile the town believes Dick to be destitute after a check bounces due to a bank error.
10010"Sweet and Sour Charity"Lee ShallatDavid Tyron KingDecember 8, 1986 (1986-12-08)611219.0/28[104]
Dick and Joanna have an opportunity to shed their 'town newcomer' status when Dick's asked to run a fundraiser for the local library. Dick, the former advertising executive, finds it a hard pill to swallow when his idea is rejected and Joanna's is unanimously applauded.
10111"Everybody Ought to Have a Maid"Peter BaldwinMichael LomanDecember 15, 1986 (1986-12-15)611320.5/30[105]
Stephanie fears she might lose her job when she breaks her toe and she is temporarily replaced. Millicent Martin as her highly-efficient replacement.
10212"Saturday in New York with George"Peter BaldwinStuart Kreisman & Chris CluessDecember 22, 1986 (1986-12-22)611017.5/26[106]
Dick and George attend a literary party in New York. Dick worries that George won't fit in with the high class partygoers and is stunned and jealous when George is the life of the party. Clive Revill, Robert Harper and Bill Quinn appear as party guests.
10313"Love Letters in the Mud"J.D. LobueShelley ZellmanJanuary 5, 1987 (1987-01-05)611119.5/28[107]
Michael helps Larry pursue the girl of his dreams (Valerie Mahaffey) and Joanna holds Dick responsible for his actions in her dream.
10414"First of the Belles"Peter BaldwinDouglas WymanJanuary 12, 1987 (1987-01-12)611521.5/31[108]
Dick's old college sweetheart (Shelley Fabares) visits the Inn, prompting concerns that she intends to reunite with Dick. Edan Gross has a funny cameo.
10515"It's My Party and I'll Die If I Want To"Michael LessacKerry EhrinJanuary 19, 1987 (1987-01-19)611622.9/31[109]
Cousin Ned Vanderkellen (Lyle Talbot) celebrates his 100th birthday but dies during the celebration.
10616"Chimes They Are a Changin'"J.D. LobueTom Seeley & Norm GunzenhauserJanuary 26, 1987 (1987-01-26)611719.5/27[110]
George tries to fix the town's bell tower after a big snowstorm and Michael rents The Wizard of Oz to overcome his fear of wind. Michael McManus plays a contractor competing with George for the job.
10717"Unfriendly Persuasion"David SteinbergMiriam TrogdonFebruary 2, 1987 (1987-02-02)611820.0/30[111]
Dick attempts to help Joanna overcome her fear of eye doctors. After she disappoints him one time too many, George tells Stephanie that they can no longer be friends.
10818"Jail, Jail, the Gang's All Here"J.D. LobueArnie KogenFebruary 9, 1987 (1987-02-09)611918.0/25[112]
Larry, Darryl, and Darryl ask Dick to represent them after they're arrested for allegedly rustling a neighbor's cow. Stephanie and Michael suffer a crisis when a cuter couple appears in town. Ritch Brinkley as the brothers' neighbor.
10919"Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Loudon"Michael LessacMerrill MarkoeFebruary 16, 1987 (1987-02-16)610618.0/25[113]
Dick gains an unwanted reputation as an acerbic wit after verbally assaulting an inept guest. Stephanie decides to get personalized license plates. Guest appearances by Simon Jones and Edwin Newman.
11020"Fun with Dick and Joanna"Peter BaldwinLinda Campanelli & M.M. Shelly MooreFebruary 23, 1987 (1987-02-23)612019.3/28[114]
Dick and Joanna find that spontaneity isn't all its cracked up to be after Dick's spontaneous plans land them in a fleabag motel for the worst night of their lives. A young Gregory Jbara plays an unwelcome guest.
11121"Night Moves"David MirkinDavid MirkinMarch 9, 1987 (1987-03-09)612215.7/22[115]
When Joanna throws him out, Dick must find another place to sleep.
11222"Harris Ankles PIV for Web Post"Douglas WymanDouglas WymanMarch 16, 1987 (1987-03-16)612121.9/32[116]
Michael interviews for a network job. George discovers an unusual rock formation. Dick interviews a senator (Michael Fairman). Michael and Dick reminisce about 1970s TV shows and debate whether the star of The Bob Newhart Show had a "stutter" or a "stammer".
11323"Good Bye and Good Riddance, Mr. Chips"David SteinbergArnie KogenApril 6, 1987 (1987-04-06)612317.8/26[117]
Dick enrolls in a typing class, only to find that the teacher, Mr. Brooney (William Windom), is the same tyrant he had for a sixth-grade teacher.
11424"Much to Do Without Muffin"Peter BaldwinTom Seeley, Norm Gunzenhauser and David Tyron KingApril 13, 1987 (1987-04-13)612416.7/26[118]
Michael is lost when Stephanie goes away for the weekend. He goes to a Beaver Lodge dinner with George and is the life of the party. Russell Johnson has a cameo as a lodge member who joins the group in watching a Gilligan's Island marathon.

Season 6 (1987–88)

[edit]
No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air dateProd.
code
Rating/share
(households)
1151"Here's to You Mrs. Loudon"Michael LessacMiriam TrogdonSeptember 14, 1987 (1987-09-14)710216.3/25[119]
Joanna has difficulty discouraging a teenager (Robert MacNaughton) who has a crush on her. George tries to find a nickname for himself.
1162"Prima Darryl"Dick MartinArnie KogenSeptember 21, 1987 (1987-09-21)710419.1/30[120]
Larry is no longer the leader when he learns that one of the Darryls is the oldest of the three. George annoys everyone at the Inn with his new sing-along boombox, the Portable Lounge Lizard.
1173"Inn This Corner"Peter BaldwinM.M. Shelly Moore & Linda CampanelliSeptember 28, 1987 (1987-09-28)710115.2/23[121]
Dick and Joanna enjoy a fun couple (Allen Williams and Julie Cobb) who stay at the Inn until they say that they are opening another Inn down the street from the Stratford.
1184"Me and My Gayle"Barton DeanTom Seeley & Norm GunzenhauserOctober 5, 1987 (1987-10-05)710319.5/30[122]
George's forty-year high school reunion presents him with the opportunity to finally let his secret crush (Betsy Palmer) know his feelings for her. Stephanie and Michael are distressed when the new Winter fashion looks are unveiled.
1195"Reading, Writing, and Rating Points"David SteinbergDavid Tyron KingOctober 12, 1987 (1987-10-12)710519.2/29[123]
Michael steals an idea for a new program from a student (John Zarchen) in the television production class he teaches. George's prediction of when the leaves will change to their Fall colors brings a guest (John Putch) to the Inn.
1206"Vintage Stephanie"Douglas WymanDouglas WymanOctober 19, 1987 (1987-10-19)710616.9/25[124]
Stephanie panics when she discovers she's no longer "blossoming". It takes Larry, Darryl, and Darryl's sage advice to break her depression. George buys blue jeans.
1217"Take Me to Your Loudon"Zane BuzbyDavid Tyron KingOctober 26, 1987 (1987-10-26)711118.3/28[125]
Michael seeks to create an Orson Welles-style panic when he programs The War of the Worlds on Halloween night. Dick desperately tries to control the panicked guests at the Inn's costume party.
1228"Till Depth Do Us Part: Part 1"Michael LessacMiriam TrogdonNovember 9, 1987 (1987-11-09)711216.4/24[126]
Michael and Stephanie seek the help of a therapist after they realize their relationship might be growing cold. First appearance of Dr. Mary Kaiser (Melanie Chartoff).
1239"Till Depth Do Us Part: Part 2"Michael LessacArnie KogenNovember 16, 1987 (1987-11-16)711315.5/23[127]
Michael and Stephanie plan their wedding. Jose Ferrer's final appearance as Arthur Vanderkellen.
12410"Telethon Man"David MirkinDavid MirkinNovember 23, 1987 (1987-11-23)710718.1/27[128]
Dick hosts a 48-hour telethon to raise money for WPIV.
12511"Laugh at My Wife, Please"Michael LessacDan O'ShannonDecember 7, 1987 (1987-12-07)710815.8/24[129]
Joanna delivers Dick's unfunny speech when she's picked to give historical presentations to tour groups. George babysits the Darryls while Larry vacations.
12612"Support Your Local Shifflet"Peter BaldwinBurt PrelutskyDecember 14, 1987 (1987-12-14)710916.6/24[130]
Dick encourages Officer Shifflet to go on strike when the town does not give him a raise.
12713"My Three Dads"Jim BuckDouglas WymanJanuary 4, 1988 (1988-01-04)711517.2/24[131]
Larry, Darryl and Darryl decide to adopt a child without knowing their child (Kevin Wixted) will be 18 years old. Nancy Lenehan as adoption agent. (Beginning with this episode, the list of guest stars in the closing credits also identifies the character each actor portrayed.)
12814"A Friendship That Will Last a Lunchtime"Peter BaldwinDavid MirkinJanuary 11, 1988 (1988-01-11)711617.7/26[132]
Dick's former co-host, Buffy Denver (Julie Brown), visits the Inn and becomes friends with Stephanie after discovering they have much in common.
12915"Presence of Malice"David SteinbergMarjorie GrossJanuary 18, 1988 (1988-01-18)711417.8/26[133]
Dick has a showdown with a TV critic (Roderick Cook) after he says several negative things about Vermont Today. Larry, Darryl & Darryl make a pancake that looks like a celebrity.
13016"Would You Buy a Used Car from This Handyman?"Dick MartinDavid Tyron KingFebruary 1, 1988 (1988-02-01)711715.6/23[134]
George wishes to pursue his dream of becoming a used-car salesman. Stephanie and Michael build a Snow-Steph. Kurt Fuller plays a sleazy car salesman.
13117"The Buck Stops Here"Lee ShallatTom Seeley & Norm GunzenhauserFebruary 8, 1988 (1988-02-08)711813.9/19[135]
Dick is skeptical of the town's belief in its good luck charm, the Great White Buck. He soon encounters the creature himself, not in a good way. A guest at the Inn (Bill Maher) pesters Stephanie for a date.
13218"Attention WPIV Shoppers"David SteinbergMerrill MarkoeFebruary 15, 1988 (1988-02-15)711016.8/24[136]
Dick is coaxed into hosting a home shopping show with Stephanie. Joanna tries to make the pudding that George's mother made for him when he was a boy.
13319"The Big Uneasy"Dick MartinArnie KogenFebruary 22, 1988 (1988-02-22)711915.8/22[137]
Michael is tempted by a television executive (Carol Huston) during a conference in New Orleans. After fire destroys the kitchen of the Minuteman Cafe, Joanna reluctantly agrees to let Larry, Darryl & Darryl temporarily use the Stratford's kitchen and dining room to serve their lunch and dinner customers. Mindy Rickles and Scott Lawrence have early-career cameos.
13420"Draw Partner"Dick MartinMarjorie GrossMarch 7, 1988 (1988-03-07)712016.3/25[138]
Dick gets a chance to work with his favorite illustrator (Eileen Brennan), but she turns out to be difficult. Joanna and George wait for the Inn's 5,000th guest to arrive.
13521"A Midseason's Night Dream"David MirkinDavid MirkinMarch 14, 1988 (1988-03-14)712117.5/27[139]
This episode goes inside several characters' dreams: Dick dreams all his troubles have disappeared; George dreams he can fly; Stephanie dreams of being tormented by a wicked Joanna; Michael runs three major networks; and Larry guest hosts The Tonight Show. Special appearances by Ed McMahon (voice only), Tommy Newsom, Joan Embry, Fred Travalena and Emma Samms as themselves.
13622"Newsstruck"Douglas WymanDouglas WymanMarch 21, 1988 (1988-03-21)712215.8/24[140]
Michael starts producing the news, and to his surprise, he enjoys it, but Stephanie feels neglected. George tries to give up on the Red Sox. Julia Duffy's real-life husband Jerry Lacy appears as the news anchor. Dakin Matthews plays the news editor.
13723"The Gleeless Club"David SteinbergMiriam TrogdonMay 2, 1988 (1988-05-02)712413.4/21[141]
Dick is accepted into the town glee club while Joanna is not. Anne Nelson as the choir director.
13824"Courtin' Disaster"Lee ShallatTom Seeley & Norm GunzenhauserMay 9, 1988 (1988-05-09)712313.3/20[142]
Joanna sets George up on a blind date. Everything goes perfectly for George and his date (Elinor Donahue) until her ex-boyfriend (Ron Karabatsos) shows up. A guest at the Inn (Jason Alexander) is a very generous tipper.

Season 7 (1988–89)

[edit]
No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air dateProd.
code
U.S. viewers
(millions)
Rating/share
(households)
1391"Town Without Pity"David SteinbergDan O'Shannon & Tom AndersonOctober 24, 1988 (1988-10-24)810218.0[143]13.0/20[143]
A prisoner (Ken Jenkins) breaks out of prison using one of Dick's "How-to" books. Rebecca Schull has a cameo.
1402"Apples, Apples, Apples"Peter BaldwinBob Bendetson & Howard BendetsonOctober 31, 1988 (1988-10-31)810416.2[144]12.2/20[144]
Michael revs up the stale Ye Olde Apple Days festival, leaving George and his traditional activities in the cold... until George organizes a rival festival. Larry and his brothers stage a walk-a-thon when swampland is endangered. Chester debates with Jim whether Stubby Kaye was in The Music Man. (William Lanteau (Chester) had played opposite Kaye in Li'l Abner.)
1413"This Blood's for You"Dick MartinMark Egan & Mark SolomonNovember 14, 1988 (1988-11-14)810517.1[145]13.0/20[145]
Stephanie is initially horrified to discover that a blood transfusion during an emergency appendectomy came from Larry's other brother Darryl.
1424"I Married Dick"Lee ShallatShelley ZellmanNovember 21, 1988 (1988-11-21)810315.9[146]11.6/18[146]
Stephanie is worried after she learns that Michael had large ears as a child. Dick and Joanna attend a counseling session for couples with therapist Mary Kaiser (Melanie Chartoff). Jack Riley (Elliot Carlin on The Bob Newhart Show) makes an appearance as one of Dr. Kaiser's patients. In a coincidental foreshadowing of the series finale, Dick tells Riley's character that he looks familiar. The group therapy session features a low-income couple named the Hollidays.
1435"Goonstruck"Michael LessacBilly Van Zandt & Jane MilmoreDecember 12, 1988 (1988-12-12)810116.7[147]12.3/19[147]
Stephanie becomes attracted to a stonemason (Jeff Yagher) working at the Inn. Joanna wants to update the Inn's brochure, and goes on a photo-taking binge.
1446"I Came, I Saw, I Sat"Dick MartinShelley ZellmanDecember 19, 1988 (1988-12-19)810817.9[148]13.2/21[148]
Dick's father (Bob Elliott) visits the Inn.
1457"Twelve Annoyed Men...and Women"Peter BaldwinBob BendetsonJanuary 9, 1989 (1989-01-09)811016.9[149]12.8/19[149]
Dick's patience is tried when he's elected foreman of a jury of the townspeople, who as always use their peculiar intellect to irk Dick. First appearance of town librarian Prudence Goddard (Kathy Kinney). Tim Choate plays a lonely juror who votes opposite of everyone else, to keep the group going.
1468"Home for the Hollidays"Stephen C. GrossmanEllen GuylasJanuary 16, 1989 (1989-01-16)810617.7[150]13.0/20[150]
Joanna lands a job selling real estate. Her first sale hits a snag when her low-class clients, the Hollidays, stay at the Inn while looking for a home. Dick leaves the Inn to George in his will, to Stephanie's consternation.
1479"Shoe Business Is My Life"David SteinbergDan O'Shannon & Tom AndersonJanuary 23, 1989 (1989-01-23)810717.3[151]12.6/19[151]
Michael searches for a job when he is fired by WPIV's new station manager (Robert Rockwell). Larry, Darryl & Darryl gather donations for a time capsule.
14810"George and the Old Maid"Dick MartinDan O'Shannon & Tom AndersonFebruary 6, 1989 (1989-02-06)811116.1[152]11.7/17[152]
The Inn's old maid, Madelyn Stone (Inga Swenson), returns after a 25-year absence to answer George's marriage proposal.
14911"Hi, Society"Michael LessacDavid Silverman & Stephen SustarsicFebruary 13, 1989 (1989-02-13)811219.1[153]13.9/21[153]
Dick fills in for Michael and takes Stephanie to a high society charity ball. Dick is the life of the party after Stephanie tells everyone that Dick owns a large hotel chain. First appearance of Scooter Drake (Alex Hyde-White). Frances Fisher plays a frenemy of Stephanie's. Merv Griffin has a cameo as himself. Various offscreen celebrities' names are dropped, including Donald Trump. Stephanie and George try to catch a glimpse of a reclusive guest (Leslie Jordan).
15012"Cupcake on My Back"Michael LessacStory by : Billy Van Zandt & Jane Milmore and Mark Egan & Mark Solomon
Teleplay by : Mark Egan & Mark Solomon
February 20, 1989 (1989-02-20)810918.7[154]13.1/19[154]
Michael is in debt when he spends his money on Annual Cupcake Day. A poker game comes between Jim and Chester's friendship. Michael and Stephanie's therapist (Melanie Chartoff) is a customer at the shoe store, just before Michael is fired and breaks up with Stephanie.
15113"Another Saturday Night"Arlene SanfordBob Bendetson & Howard BendetsonFebruary 27, 1989 (1989-02-27)811317.0[155]12.8/20[155]
Michael and Joanna endure an initially torturous evening at Larry, Darryl and Darryl's house. Dick gives a commencement speech at an exclusive children's school. Raye Birk plays the school's dean.
15214"The Nice Man Cometh"Dick MartinBilly Van Zandt & Jane MilmoreMarch 13, 1989 (1989-03-13)811417.7[156]13.0/20[156]
Dick is forced to be the sidekick for a new late-night talk show, Vermont Tonight, hosted by a washed-up comedian named "Don Prince" (Newhart's long-time friend Don Rickles). Ed McMahon plays a guest on the show. Robert Rockwell as the TV station owner.
15315"One and a Half Million Dollar Man"Peter BaldwinBob Bendetson & Howard BendetsonMarch 20, 1989 (1989-03-20)811518.2[157]13.6/21[157]
Wealthy society blue blood Scooter Drake (Alex Hyde-White) comes to Vermont in hopes of buying an inn. Larry and the Darryls seem to know Scooter. Michael begins a new career as a mime.
15416"The Little Match Girl"David SteinbergDan O'Shannon & Tom AndersonMarch 27, 1989 (1989-03-27)811615.8[158]12.4/21[158]
While visiting Michael in a sanitarium he has checked himself into, Dick runs into illustrator Corinne Denby (Eileen Brennan) and invites her to collaborate with him on his next book... despite her habit of burning things. Robert Picardo plays an inmate with homicidal leanings.
15517"Buy, Buy Blues"David SteinbergStory by : Jerry Lacy
Teleplay by : Heather Stewart
April 10, 1989 (1989-04-10)811719.5[159]15.1/24[159]
Trying to forget Michael, Stephanie throws her clothes away and goes on a shopping spree. Michael is released from the sanitarium after his evaluation period ends. Dr. Kaiser (Melanie Chartoff) confesses to Michael that she is attracted to him. Then Stephanie visits Dr. Kaiser about her shopping addiction, and a verbal catfight ensues.
15618"Message from Michael"Jim BuckShelley ZellmanApril 24, 1989 (1989-04-24)811820.0[160]15.3/26[160]
Michael appears as a guest on Vermont Today and briefly becomes a town favorite after expressing his "Let it go!" philosophy.
15719"Homes and Jo-Jo"Michael LessacBob Bendetson & Howard BendetsonMay 1, 1989 (1989-05-01)811918.7[161]13.9/22[161]
Joanna gets her own TV real estate show, but is surprised to find it comes with a seemingly amorous male co-host (Robert Curtis Brown). Larry's other brother Darryl is gifted a manservant (David Shaughnessy).
15820"Georgie and Bess"Lee ShallatDan O'Shannon & Tom AndersonMay 8, 1989 (1989-05-08)812018.8[162]13.9/21[162]
George's Aunt Bess (Ann Morgan Guilbert) visits the Inn but does not seem to be the kind of woman he remembered. Dick and Larry's brother Darryl begin a game of chess. In black-and-white sequences, Tom Poston plays his own father, with Jason Marin as the young George. The Inn's basement makes an appearance. Michael gets a new job at a grocery store.
15921"Murder at the Stratley"Michael LessacBilly Van Zandt & Jane MilmoreMay 15, 1989 (1989-05-15)812116.9[163]12.6/20[163]
As a change of pace, Dick writes a murder mystery, with characters closely resembling his wife and the townspeople. After Joanna leaves to visit her ailing mother, other story elements appear to be coming true, and the town suspects Dick of murdering Joanna. During a rainstorm, Chester reports that the Thomas Hill Bridge is out. (Thomas Hill plays Chester's friend Jim.) Alvy Moore has a cameo as a deliveryman. The frost on Michael and Stephanie's relationship begins to thaw.
16022"Malling in Love Again"Dick MartinBob Bendetson & Shelley ZellmanMay 22, 1989 (1989-05-22)812217.5[164]13.3/21[164]
Michael and Stephanie conduct personal interviews at the mall and realize that they're perfect together after all. Johnny Carson appears as himself, a friend of Larry, Darryl and Darryl. Linda Sorenson plays a waitress. Steven Culp as Brett. Craig Bierko as Dirk. J. J. Wall in the first of three appearances as "Floyd D. Barber". Jane Milmore as a Stephanie clone.

Season 8 (1989–90)

[edit]
No.
overall
No. in
season
TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal air dateProd.
code
U.S. viewers
(millions)
1611"Don't Worry Be Pregnant"Dick MartinBob BendetsonSeptember 18, 1989 (1989-09-18)910118.2[165]
Michael and a pregnant Stephanie return from a six-month honeymoon cruise totally unprepared for parenthood. J.J. Wall as mall security officer Floyd D. Barber.
1622"Get Dick"Peter BaldwinNell ScovellSeptember 25, 1989 (1989-09-25)910317.1[166]
Dick accidentally burns down Maison Hubert while enjoying an after-dinner cigar. The Loudons take in Hubert while he recuperates. Hubert (I.M. Hobson) vows he will "get Monsieur Loudon".
1633"Poetry and Pastries"Michael LessacMichele Gendelman & Ellen HermanOctober 2, 1989 (1989-10-02)910214.4[167]
Dick is chosen to judge the annual Poetry and Pastry contest. Miss Goddard, the reigning champion, uses her feminine wiles to try to influence the judging. Michael throws an all-male baby shower.
1644"Utley Exposed"Dick MartinHoward BendetsonOctober 16, 1989 (1989-10-16)910517.1[168]
An episode of Vermont Today on 'Hidden Shame' nets a surprise guest when George admits to a childish prank. Ellen Albertini Dow as a townsperson.
1655"Ramblin' Michael Harris"David SteinbergMark Egan & Mark SolomonOctober 23, 1989 (1989-10-23)910618.0[169]
Michael quits his job at the grocery store to become a lounge singer.
1666"Meet Michael Vanderkellen"Stephen C. GrossmanBrad IsaacsNovember 13, 1989 (1989-11-13)910417.2[170]
Stephanie's mother offers to buy the newlyweds a mansion, but only if Michael changes his last name to Vanderkellen. Priscilla Morrill's final appearance as Marian Vanderkellen.
1677"Good Lord Loudon"Dick MartinBrad IsaacsNovember 20, 1989 (1989-11-20)910818.8[171]
A cash-strapped visiting dignitary (Tony Jay) makes Dick a royal Lord. After hearing of his good fortune, the townspeople's opinion of Dick jumps up a notch (temporarily), and Stephanie and Michael choose Dick as the baby's godfather. David Pressman as the shoe salesman. Ellen Albertini Dow as a townsperson.
1688"Cupcake in a Cage"Lee ShallatBob Bendetson & Howard BendetsonDecember 4, 1989 (1989-12-04)911120.2[172]
Stephanie is sent to jail after she slaps a security guard in a fit of prenatal hormones. Chip Zien as a harried guest. J.J. Wall as mall security guard "Floyd D. Barber".
1699"Attack of the Killer Aunt"Michael LessacBill Fuller & Jim PondDecember 11, 1989 (1989-12-11)910720.5[173]
Joanna's aunt, Louise (Nancy Walker), visits bearing gifts, despite her long-standing opinion that Joanna is much too good for Dick. Larry, Darryl & Darryl buy a Rolls-Royce. John McCook plays Joanna's old flame.
17010"I Like You, Butt..."David SteinbergRenee Phillips & Carrie HonigblumDecember 18, 1989 (1989-12-18)910921.5[174]
George meets the perfect girl (Jan Cobler), except for her large rear end. Michael and Stephanie consult with a baby naming guru (Keene Curtis).
17111"Jumpin' George"Michael LessacBrad Isaacs & Nell ScovellJanuary 1, 1990 (1990-01-01)911223.7[175]
George plans on never sleeping again when he's plagued by a recurring nightmare. Michael and Stephanie use 'wombphones' to educate their future child. Melanie Chartoff as the therapist. Peggy Fleming has a cameo as herself.
17212"Lights, Camera, Contractions!"Michael LessacMark Egan & Mark Solomon & Bob BendetsonJanuary 8, 1990 (1990-01-08)911426.8[176]
It is baby time for the Harrises as Steph's baby is about to be born. Michael is determined to capture the birth on tape over Stephanie's objections. This episode concludes with a montage of characters from other popular CBS TV shows of 1990: Jean Smart of Designing Women, Patrick Duffy of Dallas, Gerald McRaney of Major Dad and Angela Lansbury of Murder She Wrote, all of them parroting "I think Michael and Stephanie will make wonderful parents" for Michael's camcorder video.
17313"Beauty and the Pest"David SteinbergMichele Gendelman & Ellen HermanJanuary 15, 1990 (1990-01-15)911021.6[177]
Joanna's real estate show lands her an odd client (Tim Choate) who can't seem to commit to buying a house, until a surprise visit to his home reveals a shrine to Joanna. Stephanie and Michael invite the entire town to view their new baby, "little Stephanie". Mike is upset that the baby cries when he holds her, but discovers that she can be "bought".
17414"Good Neighbor Sam"Lee ShallatNell ScovellJanuary 29, 1990 (1990-01-29)911518.3[178]
Dick reluctantly spends time with Sam (Bill Daily), a depressed guest at the Inn, who then unexpectedly buys the house next door. The townsfolk, who all assume Dick is their best friend, are in an uproar when they hear that Dick and Sam are "best friends."
17515"Child in Charge"Dick MartinDavid LernerFebruary 5, 1990 (1990-02-05)911319.8[179]
Stephanie's parents buy WPIV for baby Stephanie. Dick refuses to pander to the child, forcing baby Steph to cancel Vermont Today in the middle of an interview with George McGovern.
17616"Seein' Double"Dick MartinBob BendetsonFebruary 19, 1990 (1990-02-19)911617.1[180]
Michael announces plans to spice up WPIV's lineup with a new sitcom, Seein' Double, starring Stephanie as identical twins Judy and Jody, with Dick as their crotchety widowed father. Don Knotts makes a brief appearance as one of the sitcom's characters.
17717"Born to Be Mild"Peter BaldwinBob Bendetson & Howard BendetsonFebruary 26, 1990 (1990-02-26)911818.2[181]
Dick is roped into joining George's old gang, the Hooligans, when they reunite after 40 years apart. Dick leads them into a rumble against their long-time rivals, the Ruffians.
17818"Daddy's Little Girl"Michael LessacBrad IsaacsMarch 5, 1990 (1990-03-05)911917.9[182]
After another shopping spree for baby Steph, Dick teaches Michael that materialism isn't the best way to raise a child. A skeptical Michael becomes convinced after a haunting dream depicts a possible future. Julia Duffy plays the grown-up baby Steph.
17919"Georgie and Grace"Peter ScolariJim Pond & Bill FullerMarch 19, 1990 (1990-03-19)911717.4[183]
George falls under the influence of five priests vacationing at the Inn. After George announces his intention to join the priesthood, Miss Goddard tries her best to change his mind. James Hampton, George O. Petrie and Tom Virtue play priests.
18020"Handymania"Jim BuckNell Scovell & Brad Isaacs and Jim Pond & Bill FullerApril 9, 1990 (1990-04-09)912118.6[184]
George is the toast of the town when he invents a hot new board game called "Handyman". Kenneth Tigar plays a tough-acting toy store manager.
18121"Dick and Tim"Michael LessacBob BendetsonApril 30, 1990 (1990-04-30)912218.0[185]
Dick finagles his way into a weekly poker game with Tim Conway. Unaware of Tim's cheap nature, Dick drives him away after raising a quarter. Joanna and Stephanie make an effort to keep Miss Goddard from being alone on her birthday. Audrie Neenan plays a waitress.
18222"Father Goose"Stephen C. GrossmanStory by : Mark Egan & Mark Solomon
Teleplay by : Brad Isaacs & Nell Scovell
May 7, 1990 (1990-05-07)912317.6[186]
Michael comes up with the perfect lead-in to Vermont Today, the Giddy Goose show. He casts his favorite dinner theater actor (Henry Gibson) as Giddy, only to discover the man's also his father. George Innes plays another actor who auditions for the Giddy role.
18323"My Husband, My Peasant"Dick MartinJerry LacyMay 14, 1990 (1990-05-14)912020.0[187]
Society bluebloods Scooter Drake (Alex Hyde-White) and his new wife, Libby (Randall Edwards), drop by with a child of their own, apparently superior to baby Steph in every way. Michael and Stephanie nearly divorce due to Michael's peasant heritage, until some humbling facts about Scooter and Libby's own parentage emerge.
18424"The Last Newhart"Dick MartinMark Egan & Mark Solomon & Bob BendetsonMay 21, 1990 (1990-05-21)912429.5[188]
At a town meeting, a Japanese visitor announces his intentions to purchase the entire town and turn the land into a gigantic golf course. Everyone but Dick sells out. In a final twist, the episode is revealed to be a dream by Dr. Robert Hartley, Newhart's character from The Bob Newhart Show. Suzanne Pleshette reprises her role as Emily Hartley in that scene. Lisa Kudrow plays "Sada", one of the three over-talkative wives of Larry, Darryl, and Darryl. Gedde Watanabe, Sab Shimono, Shuko Akune and Rodney Kageyama are among the Japanese contingent.

References

[edit]
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