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Talk:Kansas Business Hall of Fame

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Did you know nomination

[edit]
The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by Bruxton talk 23:15, 26 December 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Moved to mainspace by Bsoyka (talk). Self-nominated at 21:04, 22 December 2023 (UTC). Post-promotion hook changes for this nom will be logged at Template talk:Did you know nominations/Kansas Business Hall of Fame; consider watching this nomination, if it is successful, until the hook appears on the Main Page.[reply]

Policy: Article is sourced, neutral, and free of copyright problems
Hook: Hook has been verified by provided inline citation
QPQ: Done.

Overall: 3233 characters, moved to mainspace on 22 December, neutral, the inductees are referenced by the Hall of Fame's own list and their own pages confirm the businesses they were involved in. Copyvio check only brought up appropriately cited quotes. Hook is interesting. Good to go. Nathan121212 (talk) 19:59, 24 December 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Nathan121212 and Bsoyka: Comment: We might want to fix up the hook because it is a WP:SEAOFBLUE and also because editors recently discussed an issue with links in hooks. Lightburst (talk) 15:13, 25 December 2023 (UTC)[reply]
Also just checked Earwig and it is a 51% so have a look to see if there is a WP:CLOP issue. It looks like quotes and titles but there may be a few sentences which can be changed to avoid close paraphrase. Lightburst (talk) 15:18, 25 December 2023 (UTC)[reply]
@Lightburst: Appreciate the feedback! For the hook, what are your thoughts on something like ALT1: ... that the Kansas Business Hall of Fame includes the founders of Pizza Hut and Russell Stover Candies?" Based on the discussion you linked, this seems to better emphasize the KBHF as the main topic and only mentions two other companies to keep it interesting but less SEA-y. As for the CLOP issue, I'll work on reducing some of that now. Bsoyka (talk) 16:06, 25 December 2023 (UTC)[reply]
Dropped the copyvio similarity down to 24.8%. Bsoyka (talk) 17:50, 25 December 2023 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks for your edits, and I think your new hook would work well. I will label it ALT1. Probably good that you reduced the number of links as well. Lightburst (talk) 19:20, 25 December 2023 (UTC)[reply]
I added a reference for Clara Stover in the article for DYKCRIT. Also note: it takes some work to see the components of the hook. The fact that Dan and Frank Carney founded Pizza Hut for instance: is hard to ascertain unless you first click on Pizza Hut. Bruxton (talk) 23:13, 26 December 2023 (UTC)[reply]