Talk:Samia Yusuf Omar/GA1
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Reviewer: Yellow Dingo (talk · contribs) 11:14, 16 October 2016 (UTC)
Taking, I'll do the full review soon. — Yellow Dingo (talk) 11:14, 16 October 2016 (UTC)
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Detailed
[edit]1a
[edit]- "harassment received" → "receiving harassment"
- "Dahabo Ali; the" → "Dahabo Ali and was the"
- "father and Uncle" → either capitalise both or uncapitalised both; not a mixture. Probably should be uncapitalised.
- "In April 2008, Omar competed in the women's 100 metres sprint at the African Championships in Djibouti. This was the first time she had left Somalia. She finished fifth out of the eight competitors. " - Two factual inaccuracies there. The 2008 African Championships in Athletics was in Ethiopia. And in her event she finished 25th out of 26 overall.
- "Her next international competition was at the 2008 African Championships in Athletics in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. She finished last in the her heat." - this sentence is the correct version of the above point. Maybe you should remove the first sentence.
- Maybe be mention her Olympic event was the 200m
Overall
[edit]Nice article, putting on hold. — Yellow Dingo (talk) 06:08, 17 October 2016 (UTC)
- @Yellow Dingo: Thanks for reviewing, I've made those amendments and removed that erroneous line. Miyagawa (talk) 09:44, 17 October 2016 (UTC)
- Ok Miyagawa passing. Well done! — Yellow Dingo (talk) 09:45, 17 October 2016 (UTC)