User:Captain Crawdad
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CRAWDAD: This is Captain Crawdad.
YOU: Hello, Crawdad.
CRAWDAD: That's Captain Crawdad, you miserable scum. I earned these stars while you were still swimming in your pappy's spawn.
YOU: Okay.
CRAWDAD: Shall we start again?
YOU: No, I was just humoring you. I don't really want to talk to you.
CRAWDAD: Oh.
YOU: Can you direct me to the exit?
CRAWDAD: The exit?
YOU: Yes, the way out of this page. Your user page. I want to leave it.
CRAWDAD: Go out the way you came in, jerk. I don't need you.
YOU: Thank you. If you'll excuse me.
CRAWDAD: I have too many friends anyway. I'm popular.