User:Slapadabass19
Bio
[edit]Welcome to my personal bio. I'm a musician and college student at EvCC. I'm also a passionate advocate for green energy and equal rights.
I've been interested and invested in music for as long as I can remember. Being surrounded by music, whether it was going to my dad's band practices, listening to it on my own, or being exposed to my parent's musical tastes on car rides, has really helped shape a huge part of who I am today. Music as a whole has given me an appreciation for arts and an understanding and openness to what other people might enjoy, how being less judgmental and more willing to look at things, like music, from another person's perspective makes me happier. I play multiple instruments, but primarily focus on electric bass guitar, and electric guitar.
As far as my fire for advocacy goes, I blame most of that on my mom and the environment I was surrounded with in my earlier years through grade school. I've always believed in fairness and thinking about other people in need. When I think about other people, I realize things aren't very fair at all. That's where my passion and drive for advocacy and education about how to improve upon and eliminate problems that impact us all comes in. I've had some "success" in the past. Looking back to 5th grade I was able to convince my school to start using compost, get their own compost heap, and give presentations on the impacts of global warming to the classrooms. Although I have not been very active in advocacy and protest in my recent years, it is still a high interest and drive of mine. I always hope that people can think about others and think smart when they do it.
I've been driving and racing karts for about five years now. Ever since I sat down in one I knew I couldn't stop, that I'd be hooked for the rest of my life. Over the years I progressed and grew better, learning the ins and outs of the sport, becoming a part of the community, moving up to higher levels and going more often. It's a physical exercise like nothing you've ever had before, working muscles in your arm you're not used to, bruising your ribs every race from banging against the seat in each corner, needing to strengthen your neck so you can even keep your head upright in the middle of a turn, repetitively, constantly, week after week. It's.... exhilarating. Since I've been back in school, focusing on education and developing a social life, I've had less time to go racing, and haven't actually been out to our garage in over a year. I hope to get out there again soon. The internal conflict I have to deal with when I go and burn a bunch of fossil fuels for my own enjoyment and mental well being is something I think about every time I get out there.
I am attending college and I'm considering a degree path towards advanced composites, working with the materials of the future, bettering the way me manufacture and create all the things that surround us in our society. I've been interested in skateboarding for a lot of my life too, only recently getting back on the board after a few years of not using it, shaking off the rust. Because of both my interests in skating and composites, I've been very curious about the construction of skateboard decks and how composites can be used to better a tried and true design. My research continues and I hope to make an impact in the industry.
I think what I'd contribute to this site as far as edits, and original postings go is myself delving into personal interests like cars, music and skating. I hope to possibly document and bring to light some more obscure people, places, and angles that may not have been written about before. I believe that having a site like Wikipedia at your disposal is a double-edged sword. On the one hand, it gives nobodies like me a place to write and help spread useful or unknown information, on the other hand, that can leave room for sketchy writing and bias to be found in posts.
Overall I feel that I can be a decently useful member of this global encyclopedia.
Thank you for taking the time to read through my bio.
Article evaluation
[edit]Earlier in my life I used to live in Marysville, Washington. For this assignment I decided to start looking for Wikipedia articles related to Marysville. Marysville is a large city which is growing quickly in the Pacific Northwest. I know it has interesting history and an annual Strawberry festival. I visited the Strawberry festival page on Wikipedia, and found three aspects of it worth commenting on: its lack of history, its small size, and overall structure.
History
[edit]One of the first things I noticed when reading through this article is the lack of history and sections about specific festivals. I think the article could be greatly improved with a section devoted to specific festivals and some of the details involved in them. I also think that there should be a section dedicated to the origins of the Strawberry festival and how it came to be. Overall the article lacks in history and specific data about past festivals.
Size
[edit]The small size of this article is probably the most glaring issue to be seen here. There's only one paragraph that discusses what a Strawberry festival is and it's short, containing just one citation. The rest of the article only contains data on where these festivals are held globally, some of which are cited, but too many lack citations to give the reader accurate data. The article could be greatly improved by adding more sections, and providing more detail in the opening paragraph.
Structure
[edit]The issue of structure somewhat overlaps with size, there's simply not enough here to make a good, reliable article. To improve the structure on this article lots of sections and citations would be needed. For example, a section could be written that contains chronological data from the first recorded Strawberry festival, to the present. A section could also be written on other festivals that may have influenced the Strawberry festival. A section about economy and how that affects the festivals would be a great addition as well. The article needs more detail and context.
Summary
[edit]For summary, this page is not incredibly well written, cited, or sized. It needs lots of improvement and time put into it. What's there now isn't a bad start, but can't stay the way it is now. I do give the article credit for containing citations, it's definitely a step in the right direction. What I did to contribute to the improvement of the Strawberry festival page is add some of the input I've given in this evaluation by saying a citation is needed for the Wisconsin Strawberry festival.
This user is a student editor in Everett_Community_College/English_Composition_3716_(Fall). |